Thursday, June 11, 2015

Pass the Blame






We have some special people in our house.  One is called, “I didn’t do it” and  the other is It wasn’t me.”  They usually only appear like little leprechauns when something has gone awry.   Someone will come in carrying something in pieces.  It is not supposed to be in pieces, and the first thing I’ll hear is “I didn't do it.”  Or I’ll say, “Who ate the rest of the.. .” and suddenly out of nowhere “not me” will appear.  I know I’m not the first one to have this problem, In fact, the problem first started way back in the Garden of Eden.   When Adam and Eve sinned and ate of the forbidden fruit, God came looking for them.   When God asks, “Did you eat the forbidden fruit?  The first thing they did was to blame.  Adam blamed Eve.  When God questioned Eve, she blamed the serpent.  While the blame may have been slightly accurate, yes it was the snake who enticed Eve, and Eve encouraged Adam, it was also an attempt to get themselves out of hot water.   Just like when I ask “who ate …” I’ll hear “not me” usually because they don’t want someone mad at them.  We see the same problem in society.  Recently some kids were trespassing, the police were called.  The police had to restrain them because there were over 100 kids, and they were refusing to obey the commands of the police.  Now it is the police who were wrong?  The whole “pass the blame game” can be seen at any level of society and in any workplace.  In fact for some their motto is “never take the blame if you can make it look like it was someone else.”   I’d like to suggest another motto “If you do it, own it.”   God loves honesty.  Just like with Adam and Eve,  He knew who was to blame.  I believe what he wanted was for them to admit their guilt.  Say “I did it” rather than “not me.”   No, it not fun admitting that we caused a problem.  No, we don’t need to own everything that happens.  But when it is clearly our fault,  how much easier to admit it and go on.   Once we admit the guilt, it no longer controls us, AND we can put it behind us quicker.  No matter what you’ve done, the first step in healing is admitting the problem (owning it) once you accept the problem; you can move on.   It’s amazing how much more powerful you are when you can be strong enough to admit that it was your problem and not everyone else'.