Skip to main content

To Wait or Not To Wait... I



Recently, I read this article "I Waited Until My Wedding Night and I Wish I Hadn't."  As I read it, my heart broke.  This young lady obviously did not get the whole message as she was growing up about WHY sex is saved for marriage.  She has some misconceptions.

First, she is putting all sex in the same bag and calling it all "sinful and dirty."  Nothing is farther from the truth.  While we are encouraged to "abstain from sexual immorality", I would like to add that applies to unfaithfulness in a marriage as well as promiscuity.  Sex in a marriage is beautiful and encouraged.  It was instituted before Adam and Eve sinned that means it was good not bad as this young lady believes.

Secondly, she says she was taught she would "go to hell" if she had premarital sex.  There is absolutely no place in the scriptures that says "you are doomed and condemned if you have sex before you are married."  When Jesus talked with the woman at the well, he did not condemn her.  Instead, he said "Go and sin no more."  That's it! All he ever said to her was stop sinning.  It wasn't the end of the world for this woman and it's not for us either.

Third, she says "it was only her responsibility to remain pure."  In this case she is right and wrong.  Sexual purity is always an individual responsibility and decision. You cannot make this decision for anyone else, so yes in reality her sexual purity was indeed her responsibility and not the responsibility of anyone else.  She is wrong in assuming that her partner should have no responsibility for this in his own life as well. No in scripture does it teach that sexual purity is only for women. Sorry, it just isn't there.

Fourth, she equates a sexual act with love.  Love may encompass the sexual act but it is far greater than the sexual act.  Animals have sex all the time and it is never accompanied by love.  Love goes beyond a sexual act and if the only reason you marry a person is because they are "good in bed that is extremely shallow and not love at all.  I would ask this person, "What happens if you marry a person because they fulfill you sexually and at some point, they no longer fill that need?"

I have heard others say in reference to having premarital sex "it's ok to 'test drive' the vehicle.  Really? Your boyfriend/girlfriend is not a car.  Hello!! They are a person and should never be degraded to the status of a thing.  Sex is a precious and valuable gift and should not be squandered and should always have love as a prerequisite.

Do I believe sex young men and women should wait to have sex until they are married? I will answer with a resounding yes. This young ladies' problem is that she had the wrong reason why she should wait for marriage to have sex.  See, in my opinion there is only one reason good enough for you to wait until married; your love for God.  So yes wait for marriage to have sex not because your parents, or all your friends, or even your church wants you to wait.  Do it because you love God soooooo much that you can not bear to disappoint him.



Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Live Fearlessly

                                   As I was driving home today, I passed a person walking on the side of the    road.  Since it was cold, and snowy, I thought I should stop and offer the person a ride.  As I drove on by, I was irritated with myself for not stopping.  I could have and should have but I didn't. Why?  I was scared! Maybe that wouldn't bother you, but I'm willing to bet there are things that make you afraid.  It may be snakes or spiders that send the ticker into  overdrive.  Or maybe it's your job and finances that keep you up at night when you should be resting.  Then again perhaps it's relationships that consume your thoughts and energy.  As followers of God, we know that we are told not to be afraid.  Yet we often are afraid despite everything we know.   As I was driving away from a missed opportunity, I began thinking about what it is that makes us afraid.  I honestly am not sure what it is that causes us to be afraid when we should be bold, but I
Post a Comment
Read more

Tragedy: A Christian Response

I want to start by telling you a story.  We were new parents.  When Our oldest, a son, was about eighteen to twenty months we had another baby, a girl with brown hair and huge eyes.   One day as I went to feed her, my son who may have been two at the time wandered off to another part of the house.  The next thing I heard was a thud.  I grabbed my baby girl and ran to see what happened.  There was my son with a table on top of him.  He had pulled it over on himself and more blood than I had ever seen was running all over.   We put him in the car and dashed for the ER.  It was not a fun trip. He had a skull fracture and many stitches.  Fast forward about fourteen or fifteen years, I’m at a stop light and watch my youngest daughter about ten start across a street on a bike start across a street just as a truck comes around a corner into the path of the bike.  She hit the side of the truck and bounced onto the road.   I grabbed her up and checked her over there were no injuries, but
Post a Comment
Read more

Just A Word of Praise!!

  On Sunday, after church, we went to a town about thirty minutes away.   On the way we drove through an area where they were working on the road.  It was no big deal.  We had lunch, bought some food for the week, and drove back home.    Later, as we were on our way to church for the evening service, I heard the ominous flapping sound that a tire makes when it’s flat.  Yikes!  I pulled over and while I was debating how I was going to change a tire.  A car coming in the opposite direction drove by and stopped.   As the driver appeared from the vehicle, I recognized him as a neighbor and fellow believer.  He approached the car, and asked if I had an air compressor to inflate the tire.  My answer, “Yes, but I’m not sure how good it is.  I’ve never actually managed to inflate a tire using it. I may not be using it properly.”   I produced it from the trunk of the car and handed it to him.  Within a few minutes, he had it hooked up and running.   As it turned out, I was using it properly,
Post a Comment
Read more